Evolutuionary scientists predict dramatic upturn in broads looking to get boned by large dudes with body hair who can kill things
Oh my! Wonderful news out of Australia for dudes who don't look like Pete Wentz or Jared Leto...
One of the country's leading demographers, Bernard Salt, says that if evolutionary theory is correct, women have started - or are about to start - turning to stronger, bigger men.
"During the downturn the theory is that women are concerned about safety, security, food supply and so their taste in men will shift from the androgynous hairless metrosexual towards the more muscular primal hairy male,'' Salt said.
"It will unfold over the next 12 months or so.''
Analysing competitors in the Cleo Bachelor of the Year competition, Salt, who is also author of the book Man Drought, said he believed the type of men in favour could change next year.
"You might find a very subtle shift in the type of celebrity male or desired male body shape might shift from hairless, sleek, a bit wimpy to the more muscular,'' he said.
On a global stage, he said actors like Leonardo DiCaprio and Zac Efron may become less popular with female fans, while Tom Selleck lookalikes would be back at the top.
This seemingly bodes well for me as a man from the swamps recently described by media people as "tall and squarely built" and "something out of the Viking age." But since a lady friend of mine described me a while back as a "bi-metrosexual," a term she defined as "not an overly-grungy hetero but not exactly a faggy metro either," I'm a little confused as to exactly where this leaves me?
One thing, however, is for certain...this guy stands to get a lot more ass-action in the near future...
Thanks to "Rosy Glow" in the land Down Under for sending this along.
9 comments:
That makes you a hybrid grunge-metrosexual with cross over appeal so your hotness won't fluctuate no matter whether the economy's booming or busting.
Also, that guy in the picture you so kindly posted for all the women in the US to drool over isn't getting a root anywhere in the Southern hemisphere as we're not in recession down here.
I like how he has his fake guitar with his real guitar which doesn't appear to have any strings on it. I'm surprised he doesn't have the original Nintendo gun with his other guns.
Also if Aqua Teen ever goes live action he should read for Carl if he isn't in jail.
Cajun Boy, I am a tall American guy, blonde, blue, quite hairy, masculine, and muscular, but I am totally gay and I was born without a gag reflex. My Bulgarian boyfriend has black hair, blue eyes, is also a tall, hairy, gym-bodied stud, hung like a horse. We are manly and we both served in the military of our countries. Where do we fit in this evolutionary picture since we are only into cock? Cajun Boy, I have a feeling that you Cajun swamp boys will fare well in the upcoming evolutionary order with the ladies in the future. Except for a few members of the Thibodauz and Fontenot families, all Cajuns are really hot, big-hanging men, especially the Boudreaux men (I slept with a Boudreaux at GITMO a while back and he was an animal in bed). You will be fine. You have a very masculine voice and you are intelligent (some tall, hairy dudes have defeated personalities and talk with lisps and that has to be a turn-off).
I love how people can make a living and get into the media basically TOTALLY MAKING STUFF LIKE THIS UP.
I mean, I'm not against dudes from the Viking Age, but lately I've been craving dark-haired nerds. Like John Oliver-level nerdiness.
Hmm...so this is the real reason why all the hipster boys are growing out their flavor savers.
The information mainly came from Australian online dating services who noticed women were looking for 'tradies' as opposed to office workers.
Yeah, it's embelished in the article. (Um, hello, could you imagine tweens who love Efron suddenly idolising Selleck?) But the really interesting topic in the Aus media was a claim women aren't interested in pursuing careers and were using their degrees to meet men.
Wow, that guy is a looker.
Look, if you ever use the word fuck/fucking/fuckworthy anywhere within the vicinity of such a disgusting specimen again, I will come up from Australia and saw off your balls with a butter knife.
That being said, he kind of looks like an overweight Russell Brand, no?
When I was pubertyish, I liked the big burly guy, the bearded, hairy chested, even overweight type.Then I realized it was because of my father, just missing the beard. That creeped me out so I decided ALL men have their own distinct appeal and as it turned out, I have hooked up w/ tall thin hippie types, short cool James Dean types, a punky haired Sting type and I'm currently w/ a Denzel Washington type. I'm thinking of trading him in for a stocky, muscular, Harley riding, hairy chested Bronx junk yard type. Hmmm...maybe it's true?
Can I just say this:
Men who possess wit and humor pretty much have their foot in the door. I like those particular fellas in virtually all shapes, sizes, and follicular abundance... example photo type notwithstanding. In other words, I prefer braised lamb shanks to skinless chicken, but neither is off the menu no matter how good/tough times get.
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