Scattered thoughts 1/1/09

(via Eric Spiegelman)

-Last night I, like millions of other people across the country, watched the big dumb ball drop in Times Square on Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve, which meant that I had to be subjected to the occasional commentary by, well, Dick Clark. Now, before I go any further, let me state that I've long admired Dick Clark, both for the somewhat revolutionary and groundbreaking things he's done in his career, and also for his remarkable ability to appear much younger than he actually is/was. But I simply can't deal with him on television any longer.

I realize that I sound like a prick saying this, for I feel like a huge prick just thinking it, but I could barely stand to watch/hear him whenever he spoke last night. To say that it freaked me the fuck out would be a gross understatement. New Year's Eve is supposed to be a celebratory occasion, and seeing Dick on television in the midst of the moment was a titanic downer, a total mood-killer, kinda like having a bucket of ice water poured over a roaring boner. Rather than thinking about turning the page and moving forward into the future, Dick Clark's appearance made me think of death and dying. A friend of mine wrote that Clark has gone from being the youngest looking old person ever to the oldest looking old person ever.

I feel like such a dick saying this. I've had family members that had their speech and movements impaired by strokes and I'm usually hypersensitive to people with physical ailments and disabilities, but I just can't bear to watch him on television any longer.

-Nice conference Big Ten. Nice fucking conference.

-Up until today, I hadn't given much thought to New Year's resolutions. My only resolution is usually not to make any resolutions, but here goes a random list of things I'd like to do in 2009...

I'd like to drink more orange juice, receive more blowjobs, see more live music shows, write a Modern Love piece for the New York Times, watch a movie every day, drink more Bloody Marys and White Russians, eat more raw vegetables, be more of an asshole at times, journey to Asia or South America, volunteer more frequently, cook more meals at home, spend more time near open bodies of water, dedicate myself to a more rigid daily schedule, purchase a high-end juicer, play more basketball, eat less in the wee hours of the morning, pitch more ideas, cut down on my propensity to lose things, re-connect with some loved ones I've fallen out of touch with, meet more strangers from strange places, and give more hugs. And that's about all I can think of right now.

-Of all the shows in the history of television that deserved to be revived after cancellation by being picked up by another network, Scrubs has to be the least deserving of all. I really dislike that fucking show.

That's all for now. There's a warm blanket on the sofa calling out my name.