Quote of the day III
I'm reluctant to pick on Billy Joel. He's been subject to withering contempt from hipster types for so long that it no longer seems worth the time. Still, the mystery persists: How can he be so bad and yet so popular for so long? He's still there. You can't defend yourself with anti-B.J. shields around your brain. He still takes up the space, takes up A&R advances that would otherwise support a score of unrecognized but genuinely talented artists, singers, and songwriters, with his loathsomely insipid simulacrum of rock.
Therefore, I decided to make a serious effort to identify the consistent qualities across Joel's "body of work" (it almost hurts to write that) that make it so meretricious, so fraudulent, so pitifully bad. And so, risking humiliation and embarrassment, I ventured to the Barnes & Noble music section and bought a four-disc set of B.J.'s "Greatest Hits," one of which was a full disc of his musings about art and music. I must admit that I also bought a copy of an album I already had—Return of the Grievous Angel, covers of Gram Parsons songs by the likes of the Cowboy Junkies and Gillian Welch, whose "Hickory Wind" is just ravishing—so the cashier might think the B.J. box was merely a gift, maybe for someone with no musical taste. Yes, reader. I couldn't bear the sneer, even for your benefit.
And I think I've done it! I think I've identified the qualities in B.J.'s work that distinguish his badness from other kinds of badness: It exhibits unearned contempt. Both a self-righteous contempt for others and the self-approbation and self-congratulation that is contempt's backside, so to speak. Most frequently a contempt for the supposed phoniness or inauthenticity of other people as opposed to the rock-solid authenticity of our B.J.
-Slate's Ron Rosenbaum in a hilarious evisceration of Billy Joel's music. As someone who never really "got" Billy Joel, I fucking loved this whole piece, but there's a small part of me that feels sorry for the guy.
I do not, however, harbor any sort of apologetic feelings about hating Bruce Springsteen's music. Just for the record.
11 comments:
WOW CB....BOUT TIME SOMEONE SAID IT!!!!!!
Billy Joel is vastly superior to Springsteen in almost every way. I share your all out hatred for Springsteen's music (don't much care for the man himself either.)
CB,
I totally understand your position on Springsteen. That being said, had you seen him perform "My City in Ruins" with the Sessions Band at the 2006 jazzfest in front of a crowd of 50,000 you might cut him some slack. I have never seen so many people, hands in the air, tears streaming down their faces, moved by a performance in my life.
And yet you like that dork Dave Grohl who has spent a good percentage of his public life displaying a blowhard hipster's sense of superiority coupled with mediocre, boring music (Nirvana and his latest album exempted--not that I've listened--I just imagine that an album showing love for his daughter must have some merit).
Springsteen sucks. Billy Joel is an amazing showman and has been one of my favorites since I was a teenager. I have seen him in concert alone twice and once with Elton John. I like Elton too but Billy put him to shame. Anyone that questions Billy's talent should listen to Angry Young Man or New York State of Mind...you will have to appreciate him.
@8:07 anon...of settle down. taste in music, like taste in any art form, is purely subjective. i also don't care for bob dylan and many think he to be a musical genius. i don't understand why people take such offense whenever someone doesn't like the same music that they do. i could care less what you think of dave grohl. i like the guy.
I love Springsteen and Billy and I also think Grohl is completely full of himself. He acts like a frat boy and the guy is too old for that. I remember an interview with RS where he was dropping f-bombs up, down, all around. Yeesh. I'm sorry: There's something wrong with a grown man who feels (or believes) he has to fulfill some image of a punk rock star. It's so boring. Even Mick Jagger has wit and intelligence. It's okay to show intelligence. The kiddies won't reject you, Dave. You might in fact teach them something.
Now if Grohl has grown up since then, cool! Cuz he's damn cute. I've seen him at the farmer's market a couple of times with the family. Maybe I'll accidentally bump into him, see what happens. Could be dangerous. :)
Well now that the mainstream media (Slate has been around long enough to be called MSM) have started ridiculing BJ, it can't be too long before he becomes cool again -first the MSM ridicule him, then BJ tshirts (purchased from thrift shops) will be worn by the hipster, initially with irony. This is how the restoration of coolness begins.
early joel was great...so fuck you all
so was early springstein
then both got rich and pretentious
Billy Joel and Springsteen are victims of there own sucess. They made a shitload of money so they are easy targets. I wasn't a fan of Springsteen until four or five years ago but "Piano Man" was one of my first records I bought on LP when I was nine or ten.
At least Springsteen can still write relevant music and "Magic" is a great album. Billy Joel basically stopped growing artistically in the late 80's but I like his classic era music in doses. That said listen to this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_h4jxXPENU
It's Springsteen in the 70's playing my favorite song of his and it's freakin unbelievable.
For your next music-oriented rant can I nominate U2.
I never have understood, when we as people have such distinct personalities and interests that people can actually be offended by some perceived insult to our music tastes. (And this comes from someone who was once asked by an old boyfriend how I arranged my CDs: "by suck hard and suck harder?") It's no slight if someone doesn't think a movie is great that's on your top ten list of all time; maybe you think they are nuts for not laughing hysterically at Dumb & Dumber, as you still do (it's always Petey that gets me) which to me explains why music is so much more special sometimes in those 3 to 4 (or 10)minutes than all of a 2.5 hour Oscar-nominated flick can ever be. It's some sort of rhythm and habit that got pounded in our bones ages ago, and I guess we get out the cave-clubs to defend that honor.
Now, I have to defend my man Dave Grohl by saying that though I personally love him, he's not for everyone. But he (and the Foo Fighters) does what the fuck he wants and is still sucessful commercially. A lot of people roll their eyes when I listen to Ben Folds, Dave Matthews, or hell, I'll just say it, my one or two Air Supply songs, but I guess they are too dense to realize that my musical tastes say more about what a song once said to me in a moment of time than it says about how I feel about a song critically.
That said, Springsteen is best read than listened to for me, and Bob friggin Dylan, well, I missed that moment in time, as did my parents. Let's just say that. For God's sakes, I love "Shameless" by Billy Joel because my best friend in high school attempted to show me how to play it on her guitar. Whether I happened to hear the Garth Brooks version or his, which is unlikely, but still... I could close my eyes now and feel like I am right on her bedroom floor, with numb fingers and a case of frustration, and I'd feel pretty good on a shitty day. Take what you'll eat; throw the rest back. Now if you want to rid the band of an over-successful commercial act, may I suggest Nickelback?
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