In which we see one of our friends bash another one of our friends in the face with a cookie sheet

Over the course of the life of this here blog, I've been hesitant to share too much in the way of intimate details about my personal life. Sure, I've offered up stories of things I've taken part of in the past, from mutilating my genitals with a razor, having a "relationship" end over a piece of French Toast, having my salad tossed in the shower by a girl I'd met on the subway, but that's different, as those were stories that desperately needed to be told and shared with the world at large, and there's a huge difference between that sort of recollective sharing and the sort of minute to minute detailing of one's life that is often found on personal blogs, the Internet phenomenon known as "oversharing," something that I personally find rather disgusting, truth be told. But I happened to take part in something last night that I'll probably never forget for the remainder of my life, something too good not to share here in this forum, so pardon me to indulge you all with this account of what took place.

You see, last week, a couple of people that I've become friends with via the Internet (God I feel like such an idiot saying that!), the Honorable Will Leitch and AJ Daulerio of Deadspin.com, made a, ahem, friendly wager on a football game. If you read Deadspin you're probably familiar with the details of the bet, but for the benefit of those who don't, it went like this...Will is a lifelong fan of the Arizona Cardinals. Daulerio is a lifelong Philadelphia Eagles fan. This past Sunday the two teams played each other for the right to go to the Super Bowl in the NFC Championship game. They made a bet, a three-pronged bet. The first part of the bet was that the loser had to take the winner out to dinner. Will for Sushi if he won. Daulerio for tacos if he won. The second part of the bet mandated that if Will lost, he'd have his head shaved. If Daulerio lost, he'd get a buzzsaw tattooed on his ass (Will has been mocking referring to the traditionally futile Cardinals as "The Buzzsaw that is the Arizona Cardinals" for some time now). The third part of the bet mandated that the winner got to bash the loser in the face with a metal cookie sheet.

Don't ask.

Anyway, the game took place on Sunday and the Cardinals won, so yesterday was the day designated for Daulerio to get a buzzsaw tattooed on his ass and have his face smashed by Will's cookie sheet.

This is where the hilarity comes in.

On Sunday I watched the game with Eagles/Cards game with Daulerio and it was glaringly obvious that the thought of getting a buzzsaw on his ass and getting smashed in the face with a cookie sheet was making him ill. So, of course, there was no way I was going to miss this. I had no qualms about turning down invites to the Obama inauguration on Tuesday, but to witness Will smash AJ in the face with a cookie sheet I would have gotten down on my hands and knees and crawled across a bed of rusty nails and broken glass.

It did not disappoint.

I was one of three people on hand to video the occasion. The others responding to the call of duty were my friends Lindsay from Videogum and the artist's artist Jim Cooke. We had a three camera set, just like a sitcom filmed in a studio, as we didn't wanna take any chances that anything would get missed. For the sake of Daulerio's face, we were determined to get this right in one take. From here, I'll link to the Deadspin post on the event and embed the clip that Lindsay posted on Videogum below. That guy howling with uncontrollable laughter in the background...that's me. Enjoy...



And for the record, AJ soothed his aching head/face afterwards by downing multiple frozen drinks adorned with paper umbrellas. It was there that he taught me the fastest way to get rid of a brain-freeze headache...touch the roof of your mouth with your tongue. Supposedly he read it in Esquire. I called bullshit on this little "trick," but regardless, a grand time was had by all.